Lonely and unwell.

I was on my way home, after I finished from working in the city . I walked alone to my house, when it's already dark, cold, and quiet. And somehow, I feel so lonely and how much I miss my family in Indonesia. Suddenly, it was just popped up in my mind-all the memories that I spent with them in the last holiday. Usually, at that hour, I was at home with papa and mama; waiting for my sisters. I miss them badly! My mom's tummy, my dad's warm-but hard-hug (because of his skinny postures)! Even, I also miss my little sisters, who always complaint about meaningless things for the sake of my attention. Ha! I knew it. Lol

Errrmm, I miss my family. So bad. And I started to cry on the street-along the way back home. i wish they were here. I wish I were not alone. I wish, at least, there will be someone who would be waiting for me. But, it didn't turn out to be that way. Even after I reached home, no one is there. If I was in Indo, there will be papa and mama welcoming me with foods, hugs, and kisses.

Then, I started to think."What makes me want to stay here?" It's true, especially when I compare my life in here and in Indo. I have everything ready for me in Indo, I don't have to do anything and I don't have to work so hard like now. I can see mama and papa everyday. I can tell them every minutes how I love them. I will never have to feel so lonely like this.

But then, this is just a life. It is a decision that I have made. I want to stay here, and I will do anything to make my self feel happy to be here. As a grown-up person, you have to be responsible with your decisions, with your life. Plus, you have to be careful so that any decisions that you have made will not effect anybody's life. Like, even though I miss mama and papa, I should not really show it to them, because.. It will just make them sad, they will worry about me then. Instead, if I can survive here and just do everything with a grateful heart. I wish I can tell them how I feel, how much I need them, and how much I love them.

Maya.☺