Beautiful Artwork

Courtesy of Kitty Gallannaugh Photography - 365

Check her beautiful work on her Facebook fan-page! :)

Indiscernible future

Finally, only 1 day left until the final exam result is released. Well, for me.. this result will mark the end of my studies in university! 3 and a half years are spent, from Certificate IV until finally a bachelor! 

soon to be!

For most of the students who are about to graduate, they will start questioning about their future. Where are they going to stay? What are they going to do after this? What will happen after they graduate? And the list of the questions will continue to go on and on... I think this is normal, since we are still young. 


Regardless all of these worries, we have to fight for our future! Yes it is true that our future is still unseen, but again it comes back to ourself. Are we ready enough to start fighting for our own future? If the answer is not, then you'd better be. Because we are the one who will make our future. God's guidance will be necessarily needed, so always remember to pray whenever you feel lost or about to give up :)


Never be afraid of failure, but be afraid when you did nothing and regret it at the end..! Life is about falling down and getting up again, life is about learning. That's why, never think that you stop studying when you are officially graduated from university. In fact, (I think) you will just continue to study in the University of Life to get the Life Achievement and Fulfillment degree. Remember that there should be no regret in your life! Ganbatte ne~ 


mayayam ☺

Whaddup..??

It has been (almost) a month since my last post in this blog.. I have a lot of things that I want to write, but somehow my "laziness" disease has successfully attacked me! Oh well... So I end up with doing nothing. Even though I finished my exam quite early, I ended-up with working almost everyday, until I went back home to Indonesia! Wow~ I can't tell how happy I am when I finally met my family again :)

Some things that has occurred previously, such as my 'failed attempt' on the appeal for my IELTS writing results has successfully make me disappointed. Yes, I did hope a lot that they will marked up my mark (since it's only 0.5 mark to go!), but in fact.. they didn't. So here I am now, in my hometown, applying for my second IELTS test and hopefully I'll got the desired mark for my PR application. But the problem is...... I haven't prepare anything for the second test until now. I guess I will be busy studying IELTS for the next couple of days.

During this holiday, some plans has crossed into my mind, but as always I don't have the guts to try or to apply it. I hate myself when I become like this. I keep changing my mind, I keep thinking unnecessary things. And you know what, it makes me loose my focus, my plan. I even never think before that I will arrive at this stage, when I feel totally useless and have no idea about what is the purpose in my life. I become worry about a lot of "unknown-yet" things, which is actually silly, and I tend to stay at my comfort zone. Idle.

I know I'm wrong, yes. I don't know what I want, yes. I don't know what to do, absolutely.
I think now is the right time to go back to "HIM", the center of everything in this world. If you trust in HIM, nothing is impossible. He will make a way when there's no way, and He will provide when you have nothing. Yes, that is what I believe. One of my mistake is that I am puling myself away from HIM these few weeks. I don't mean to do that or purposively done that. I don't know, or what happened to me because I skipped church for 2 weeks already, and seldom pray. And now I feel horrible, I feel messed up, I am lost. I need HIM, my LORD. And I am the one who should change, not pulling myself away further from him but trying hard to get closer to HIM.

So yeah,.. That's what has happened to me recently. I am pathetic ( I think), but I (also) think that I still have time and chances. :)

Until You - Shayne Ward

Looking for someone, who can and will sing this song only for me ~

"Until You"

Baby life was good to me

But you just made it better

I love the way you stand by me

Throught any kind of weather

I don't wanna run away

Just wanna make your day

When you feel the world is on your shoulders

Don't wanna make it worse

Just wanna make us work

Baby tell me i will do whatever

It feels like nobody ever knew me until you knew me

Feels like nobody ever loved me until you loved me

Feels like nobody ever touched me until you touched me

Baby nobody, nobody,until you

Baby it just took one hit of you now I'm addicted

You never know what's missing

Till you get everything you need,yeah

I don't wanna run away

Just wanna make your day

When you feel the world is on your shoulders

Don't wanna make it worse

Just wanna make us work

Baby tell me,I'll do whatever

It feels like nobody ever knew me until you knew me

Feels like nobody ever loved me until you loved me

Feels like nobody ever touched me until you touched me

Baby,nobody,nobody until you

See it was enough to know

If I ever let you go

I would be no one

Cos I never thought I'd feel

All the things you made me feel

Wasn't looking for someone until you

Nobody, nobody, until you 

Australia..oh.. Australia!

I'm sooooo into shopping recently! I know it's bad, but I'm kinda losing my control, when I found 'something' nice on the internet. Yes, it is an online shopping that has successfully made my money $$$$$ gone ! One click, and pssiiiuuuuuu.... 0 \(o______o)/ But the good thing is, everything's become cheaper this few weeks, thanks to AUD that's going stronger and stronger everyday, almost beat the USD! Oh yeahhh, watch out America! So, it is so irresistible, when you found something nice on the internet , and the price is almost the same when you convert the USD into AUD! wth!

So, what did I buy on the internet? Most of the time, I spent my money on cosmetics, particularly Japanese brands since it's hardly to find one here. And, recently I purchased some (useless) shoes, they are cheap (it is!) but don't expect to much for the quality! Worst, i ordered the wrong sizes.. T_T So, can't wear them absolutely... And then, just yesterday, I bought a lot of cheap fashion stuff, that cost me around $200, from Korea!!! >< I regret it a little bit, realizing that maybe I spent too much since it's my first time shopping there... Anyway, good reviews about that Korean site, make me excited for my haul!! Oh pleaseeee, EMS, deliver it faster to my place!!!! :D :D :D :D Again, thanks to AUD!!! Everything's become muchhhhh cheaper! I cant explain how happy I am when the number's decreasing when I convert it into AUD! hahahahaha WOOHHHOOOOOO... Please arrive faster!!

Btw, here are the SHOEs!! Since the size is too small for me, hopefully I can give it to my little sister.. Coz her size is wayyyyyyy smaller than mine!

Love the blue ones, though :p

a gift ♥

Here are some picts from Cheryl + Acung + Winny Bday dinner, where girls' head are full of flowers and the guys look funnier with the bow tie!

Look at my flowers! Hahaha :p

Wearing BATIK with neng geulis

Pretty GIRLS with their flowers!

Cool GUYS with their "bow" tie!

I thank GOD for giving them into my life. A family that I called "friends"

Real Disaster + some picts from ICYO night!

Okay, so today is a REAL worst DISASTER ever!! I woke up late this morning, when I am supposed to open the shop. Worse, the boss came first before me and he was very mad at my manager even though luckily he didn't scold me. OMG. Then, when I have to close the shop,  I made mistakes (again); I forgot to turned on the ice machine. Oh well, s**t happens rite?

My unfortunate event continued, when I almost can't go home. The train's terminated for almost half an hour, and don't know why the train station is super crowded with people dressed-up like a rocker. Maybe, they wanted to watch a concert at Burswood. Some other people (women), they even got drunk in the train and keep shouting like crazy. Horror !!! =3=

That's enough for my disaster today.. Let's clean up all of the mess, with nice photos from ICYO night yesterday. I can't say that I enjoyed the event so much yesterday, since I'm still a newbie there and don't know most of the people there. But, overall it was a nice event, nice foods, and nice people! Can't wait to attend this event again next month, and hopefully I can get along well with them :D 

steveng-kevin-adi-din2-mayayam

with a lil-bit PS retouch. :p

the situation

what my group's made! Sandwhich, theme: "Musa menyeberangi sungai Yordan"

Last Episode!!!

AAARRRGGHHH!!!! I'm downloading the last ep. of Playful Kiss right now!!!! I really-really-really cannot wait to watch it!!! Yeah, I cant wait to see them (OHN and BSJ) together..!! They make such a lovely couple (make me want to get married early, sigh~)!

While waiting for this drama to be downloaded, I'd like to write some points. It just come up suddenly in my mind..

Girls, you should be happy and respect those guys who give you their loves.. for there's a lot of girls out there who is struggling hard to get their love.. Worse, there're also those who don't even dare to try to get their love.. So, act wisely and respect people's feelings!

Also, I want to share a song that I found last night. It is a sad song by a Swedish Singer, Amy Diamond. THe song title's Bittersweet, and somehow.. I feel that this song suit me alot,..

It's hard to find the thing to say
I'm vulnerable and frail
So I wrap my heart in bubble plastic
Just in case it breaks

Before you and I go much further now
I'm asking you to tell me
Do you really want my love?
Is it really me you're thinking of?
When you smile at me
It's so bittersweet
Let me know
Before tomorrow comes along
Cause baby I'm already in too deep
Until then I love you bittersweet

I can't let go
But this I know
I won't let you stay
If you're not sure about the way you feel
About the two of us today
Before you and I go much further now
I'm asking you to please tell me

Do you really want my love?
Is it really me you're thinking of?
When you smile at me
It's so bittersweet
Let me know
Before tomorrow comes along
Cause baby I'm already in too deep
Until then I love you bittersweet

It's heaven when when you say it's you and me
But hell when you're gone mysteriously
I'd rather be alone than lost and torn
Maybe I must make it on my own
I'm feeling incomplete
Loving you is so bittersweet

Do you really want my looo-ooo-ooo-ooooooove?

Do you really want my love?
Is it really me you're thinking of?
When you smile at me
It's so bittersweet
Oh let me know
Before tomorrow comes along
Cause baby I'm already in too deep
Until then I love you bittersweet 

Until then I love you bittersweet 
New must-watch Kdrama after Playfull kiss: 

from top-clockwise: 1. Sungkyunkwan Scandal 2. My Girlfriend is a Gumiho 3. Mary Stayed-out All Night

New blog and bunch of kisses!!!!

I started to feel better today (not in my depression mood again).. hahaha I'm not sure myself why, but maybe... it's because the new K-drama that I've watched! I love this series so much, it makes my heart beats again every-time I watch a drama (which I have never felt again for so~ long after Princess Hours and My Girl back in 2007)! So, in conclusion.. I was so happy and cannot wait for the last :( episode tomorrow!! OMG! hahahaha

♥♥♥Playful Kiss/Mischievous Kiss♥♥♥

It's a story about Baek Seungjo (BSJ) and Oh Hani (OHN).. It's not a new story, though.. Since it's based on a manga called Itazura na Kiss, and already been filmed in Japan and Taiwan (even Indonesia copied it too, lol)! I watched all the versions, and keep falling in love every-time I watch it. Yeahhh, maybe I'm just jealous with the girls, the main characters. She's not pretty, she's not smart, she just have a heart made of gold and spirit made of steel! BRAVO! I always want to be like her, but I know I'm not that type of person and it's kinda hard for me. Anyway, I adore her despite of every shameful acts that she did. And, the genius-guy loves her anyway, that's the most important thing right. :p

Okay, so enough about this series.. and I still have a list of other series to watch! Oh I wish I have more internet allowance to watch them :'( Anyway, that's for today.. And, I'm still waiting for something new (in a good way) happening into my life! Oh yeah, I'm nervous with my IELTS result which will be out by this Saturday I guess.. Zzzzzzz

kiss-kiss-kiss,

mayayam!

i need a CHANGE!

OHHHHH I really-really-really need to CHANGE!

My life's so messed-up recently! :( not only my life, though... my marks, my body, my future, my blah-blah-blah... seem so bad. yucks! I can't live like this, and I know I need to change!

I need to change my BLOG design as well! I want something more sophisticated than this, something "ME" ! hahahahaha

I WANT and NEED to CHANGE!

Loneliness

Have you ever felt so wrong and everything go not as what you expect?

Have you ever felt that your the dumbest and the meanest person in the world?

Have you ever felt that you "look like" you have everything, but actually you feel nothing?

Yes I have felt all of those feeling before.

I'm feeling lonely, even though there are a lot of people surround me.

I feel nothing, even though others thing I have everything.

Playing on a swing

It was yesterday evening, when I decided that I need some 'refreshment' and went for a walk around my neighborhood. Thanks God it's Australia, where it's not hard to find a beautiful park near your house. :p I found one small park, with a mid-size fountain lake and a playground located very near from my house (maybe about 3mins walking).

Yes, I liked it there so much and decided to call it maysecretgarden hihihihi :P Oh well, it was quite fun even though I was alone. Sometimes, I need a 'me' time even though I hate being alone, just to think about nothing and letting go some feelings. I played on a swing, gazing the world around me,.. Suddenly it feels like a flashback, all the things that's happening recently which make me a little bit stressed out. Yes, it may look like an easy problem compared to another people's problem, or it seems like something unimportant. But for me, it matters only if you know how much it hurts. But thankfully, I'm getting used to it. I'm trying to not care about it anymore. People change, life change, everything change.. and this is the truth, where reality do bites!

I played on a swing for around half an hour, with my iPod playing some memorable songs. I got inspired. Well, looking back at our life, it's like playing on a swing. At first, it will be hard for you to move.

Even after you can move forward a little bit, you have to pull back so that you can make a bigger move in the next swing, and that's how it goes. Move backward, for a bigger swing forward! It's hard, but you enjoy every move that you make so that at the end you can feel the joy by swinging very high until you can feel that you almost reach the sky!

Yes, this is how we should see our life. Every first step in our life, it will be the most difficult part that we need to face. Then, a lot of things will happen that can make as move either forward or backward. But one thing to remember, every backward move that is made will lead you to a higher forward move. Every problems that we are facing in our life, sometimes will push us backward until we realize it at the end that actually this is what make us stronger and better. Yet, like playing on a swing, we have to enjoy every movement that we make for there is a joy and pleasure sticking on it.

Who says only kids love playing on a swing. I love it, or at least I'm trying to enjoy it.. So, how about you?

I'm on my way UP

These few weeks maybe the worst weeks in this year, while everything goes down and somehow it feels so hard for me to recover. It's not a BIG-SERIOUS problem that make me depressed and stressed out everyday.. It's just a lot of little things accumulated in my mind, that annoys me and even can ruin my mood for the whole day. And now, I know that I should start getting up and FIX my self, FIX my life! I have been neglecting my future, I live my ordinary life with emptiness, without a goal, without a dream. Sigh~ So at least now I know where I have to change, and I have to be more serious now.. I have to really-really burn the bridge.. So I wont go back in the middle of my new journey!

Okayyy, so let's describe what are my life goals (what if I make it like a management report?) :

Long Term Goals:

1. I want to have my own business someday, and I'm thinking of a customized boutique or even a small cake shop! (In AUSTRALIA!!! I don't know why I want to stay here so badly now.. )
2. I want to buy a house in Applecross!

Short Term Goals

1. Study harder in my last semester, and for my IELTS test next week.
2. Find a new job, and hopefully I can get an accountant job!! Or at least, office job. sigh~
3. Get my PR approval
4. Saving money $2000/year!
5. Lose weight 5kg by the end of 201o !!! (can or not? LOL)

So yeah, that's the goal that I plan for now. I think.. Ehmmm, I'll revise my short term goals next year on my birthday..! :P Hopefully I can successfully achieve my goals! uuwaaaaaa @.@ And... in terms of ME, I also intend to change my self, change my heart. I need to CHANGE!:

• To know GOD more, to be a full time Christian
• To be more feminine, stop acting rude and scolding people
• To be calm, so won't easily get angry
• Stop talking behind peoples back, gossiping, in summary: Trying to control my mouth!
• To be more committed into promises and priorities
• To love my family even more
• To love peoples around me.

THAT's ALL for ME :D

Retreat 25-27 Sept 2010

Heiyaaa, It's been a while since my last post, huhhh... ? ;p I'm being lazy this few weeks, a chronic lazyness I guess.. Firstly, I want to write a quick review about what has happened in my life recently. I can say that this few weeks is my worst week in this year,.. :( I fail all of my tests, I gain weight, a lot of friendship issues come up, PLUS my bad mood that make me have no confidence at all and start to think negatively about my life. It's a tough week, and luckily is getting better right now. Praise the Lord! :D

Okay, so let me start my story about last Retreat that I joined! It's Sianna's church camp located in Down south from Sept 25th to Sept 27th. Because me and Sian were having an awful TAX mid-test on the 25th, so we arrive there late!

Day1 I dont know anyone there except Sian and Leslie (which I'm not really close with), and unfortunately they separate me and Sian into different groups! WORSE, only a few people in my group and I'm in the same group with Om Yusak-who is the priest of this church. So actually, only me and Markus (my group-mate) are in the groups during the whole sessions! The other members are Alvin, who has to follow the Sunday School session and another husband & wife who is too busy taking care of their son. OMG!!! I feel like I want to cry and go home directly... The situation's too weird, I don't know anyone, I can't talk to anyone, and have to be alone for most of the time :( And you should know the fact that I HATE BEING ALONE... So can you imagine how I felt at that time?

Day2 The day before was hell, but yeah.. GOD is GOOD!! Everything's getting much-much- much better in this day. I can accept being alone for a while, and I can try to communicate with others as well. So actually, this day is good! And yeahhh, some people even approach me and chat with me, therefore I don't have to be alone anymore! hahahaha Yeayyyy !!! :D Oh yeah, and due to some reason, my group's combined with another groups (just for this day). Andd... yeah, it's better since you have more people for the discussion. Hehehehe

BUT, you can be happy all the time right? At night, after we finish our activity me and Sian was preparing staff for our talent show on the next day when we heard some shocking news. It is a SHOCKING news... I can't tell whether to be happy or sad :[ However, always remember that GOD IS GOOD! So, just take the positive aspects from this news, and I can say that actually this is good for me. I think I can smile right now and be happy. Just forget about the shit. :p

Day3 This is the last day! Finally, heading home!!! hahahaha Even tough at first I feel like I want to go home soon, but actually in this last day... I want to stay there longer if I can. hahaha It's because I already started to get along with the people there, especially those CUTE KIDS!! (OMG, they're so NICE and CUTE >___<) Oh well, then we end this retreat activity with BBQ and photo session (can't wait for the photos to be uploaded on FB!)

Yipppiii,... that's a short story about my Retreat last week :D hehehehe Overall, I feel that I'm lucky enough to participate in that church. I can get a lot of things from there, a lesson to learn, meeting new people and friends, and the most important is... I can know more about my GOD. After this church activity, I feel like I have to change myself and dedicate myself more to GOD, for He's the one who always there for me and He's the one who has given me everything! I should do something for HIM and thus.. I'll try to give Him my life. I know that maybe I cant directly give Him my 100%, but I promise that I'll try little by little so I can be what HE wants me to be :) I'm proud of my GOD! Oh yeah and lastly, what I learnt (again) is that we have to be grateful for everything we have, and always keep it in mind! Kyaaaa!!!!!!! I'm so happy! hihihihihihi XD

Courage and Confidence

When I fall in love, I hope I can have the courage and confidence just to text you and ask, "How's your day?"

to be continued...

I heart my MOM

Yesterday, was not a good day for me. I was a little bit more sensitive than before, I thought of a lot of unnecessary things. Then later on at night, I called my mom just because I missed her. And of course, a daughter will always be looking for her mom, whenever she doesn't feel right or if there's something need to be discussed. I have a long (read: super-long) chat with my mom. We talked about our life recently, than about my future and my fears. I have been living my life under a lot of fears recently. It is so-not-me, especially if I compare myself with who I am when I was still in high school. But yeah, calling my mom at that time was the best decision. Because she knew right on the spot, what I was thinking and she gave me some advise. She opened my eyes last night.

Well,.. from our conversation last night I can conclude that actually my problem is not about the fear that I always think I might face in the future,.. but the problem is in myself. I'm losing my direction, my dream, and my plan. I don't have any certain good plan for my future. And I guess, I should start from now. I should re-arrange my life from now before everything's too late. :) Thank you, mama! You have really-really-really opened up my eyes!

0_____0

Mama-ku-yang-sok-cuantekk!

And this morning, before I went to work I received an SMS from my mom. She wrote (I'll just put it in INDO, I'm too lazy to translate it rite now) hihihihihii:

Ce, nggak usah mikir yang aneh2. Ingat, karir-jodoh-hidup sudah diatur sama Tuhan dan kita hanya bisa mohon untuk diberikan yang terbaik. Percayalah pada saat yang tepat, Tuhan akan memberikan yang terbaik buat cece. Ingat perjalanan hidup papa dan mama. Bawa segala kecemasan dalam doa dan Tuhan pasti akan menjawab walau tidak seketika. Itu sudah mama alamai dalam hidup mama dan orang2 di sekitar mama. :)

♥♥♥My MOM is THE BEST!! I LOVE YOU, mama!!!!♥♥♥

Living in a shadow.

It's been a long time since my last post, huh? :p Life's not too busy for me, it's just... too lazy to write on the blog. Hehehe So, here I am now! I am ready to share my thoughts in this post!

Firstly, this post is about being 'a shadow'. Confuse?? Check this lyric out first, by Ashlee Simpson called "Shadow".

I was six years old

When my parents went away

I was stuck inside a broken life

I couldn't wish away

She was beautiful

She had everything and more

And my escape was hiding out and running for the door

Somebody listen please

It used to be so hard being me

Living in the shadow

Of someone else's dream

Trying to find a hand to hold but every touch felt cold to me

Living in a nightmare

A never-ending sleep

But now that I am wide awake

My chains are finally free

Don't feel sorry for me

All the days collided

One less perfect than the next

I was stuck inside someone else's life and always second best

Oh, I love you now 'cause now I realize

That it's safe outside to come alive in my identity

So if you're listening

There's so much more to me you haven't seen

Living in the shadow

Of someone else's dream

Trying to find a hand to hold but every touch felt cold to me

Living in a nightmare

A never-ending sleep

But now that I am wide awake

Then I can finally see

Don't feel sorry for me-

Mother, sister, father, sister, mother

Everything's cool now

Mother, sister, father, sister, mother

Everything's cool now

Oh, my life is good

I've got more than anyone should

Oh, my life is good

And the past is in the past

I was living in the shadow

Of someone else's dream

Trying to find a hand to hold but every touch felt cold to me

I'm living in a new day

I'm living it for me

And now that I am wide awake

Then I can finally see

So don't feel sorry for me

Don't feel sorry, don't feel sorry for me

Don't feel sorry, don't feel sorry for me

Living in, living in, living in the shadow

Living in, living in, living in a new day

Ashlee is the younger sister of Jessica Simpson, a very famous singer with her high-pure-nice voice, and good looking appearance, and blah blah blah.. While Ashlee, just started her debut as a singer, yet a lot of people complain about her voice which is in fact not as good as her sister. And in fact, not only about her career or voice, people always compare her with her sister since she was a little girl. And since then, she start to feel the burden behind her sister's shadow. She never hates Jess, as being better than her. She never intends to steal the spotlight from her sister as well. She is just tired of living behind her sister's shadows. Like what her song says, she's tired of being second best and tired of running and hiding.. But it was then, and not now anymore. She's free to become her self and proof to the world that she's different from Jess. They both good in their own way. Again, like what she sings in her song, She's now free from the chain, and living in a new day.

Yupyupyuppp... That was a brief introduction (or example?) about living behind someone else's shadows. So, how about you? How about me? Have you felt like that? Always being second best, always behind the shadow or just stand in the background? If you do feel it, it's so sad, hey?? I know how it feels. Indeed. :) Sometimes, you feel you want to cry because of this, you just want the world to see you more and to know you more. But it is not something big that is worth of your tears. So then the question is, what will you do? Will you change yourself in order to adjust to the world, do something more -even it's not you- just to make them see more of you? Or just continue your life as someone's shadow?

Unfortunately, I cannot answer this question myself because honestly, I am stuck in this situation right now. No-no-no. I've been always stuck in this situation. I want to shout, i want to cry, but I don't know what's there to be cried for. I didn't mean that I regret my life or want something more because I have had enough. I am thankful for who I am right now, and for everything that I have. It is just... temporary mind sickness. LOL

I am really-really tired and do not know what to do to get out of this, or at least to overcome my mind towards this problem. I am waiting for someone who can see the best in me, who can make me his number one. I hope that this wait will not be too long, because I'm getting tired of waiting now..

Hatiku Percaya.

This morning, I remembered about a video post that once took my attention from my friend's facebook. It's about a testimony from Edward Chen (Indonesia's famous Christian singer and producer) and his wife, Agnes. In the video, he said that previously his relationship with Agnes was not approved by both of their parents. He didn't explain what the reason is, but at that time both of them thought that it was an impossible relationship. He quarreled with his parents, of course, like what others will do when their relationship is disapproved. However, both Edward and Agnes finally chose to broke up, since they respect their parents more than anything in this world. Even though they love each other so much, but still parents are the most important person in the world for them. They cannot do anything, other than keep praying to GOD, because in HIM nothing is impossible.

They broke-up, and Agnes decided to move to Canada to continue her study. Before she left, she called Edward's mom, and tell her not to worry anymore, because she's going to leave her son and won't contact him anymore. Then, all of a sudden, Edward's mom ask her if she really loved her son. Of course she said yes. And somehow, Edward's mom approve their relationship. They get married at the end. It's a happy ending from GOD :)

I cried when I watched their testimony. In the testimony, Agnes mentioned that at that time they prayed like crazy. They never blame GOD, as they know that every GOD's plan is good. In her prayer, she mentioned "Dear Lord, if he is really the one for me please help us get through this problem. For there's nothing is impossible in Your name If he is not the one for me, please give me strength to erase him from my mind." She let GOD do his plan without complaints, she just asked GOD to srengthen her and let GOD do the best for her. SHE TRUST HIM.

On the other hand, Edward was feeling the same. He give his everything to GOD, and let Him work things out. He wrote a song at that time, tittled "Hatiku Percaya" (eng-Trust in You). Here's the lyric:

SAAT KU TAK MELIHAT JALAN-MU

SAAT KU TAK MENGERTI RENCANA-MU

NAMUN TETAP KU PEGANG JANJI-MU

PENGHARAPANKU HANYA PADA-MU

HATIKU PERCAYA

HATIKU PERCAYA

HATIKU PERCAYA

S'LALU KU PERCAYA

LORD I WILL TRUST IN YOU

LORD I WILL TRUST IN YOU

LORD I WILL TRUST IN YOU

MY HEART WILL TRUST IN YOU

It was a simple yet beautiful song.

Here is the link for the video:

http://www.facebook.com/#!/video/video.php?v=1411804889244&ref=mf

So, for whoever you are who is now doubting about your 'future partner', DO NOT BE WORRIED! Since He has a beautiful plan for us! Just keep praying, and ask Him for a partner. Don't forget to trust in Him, too :)

Maya.

Current Issues in MY Life.

Ok, so I'll just say that my upcoming IELTS test is the most important issues in my life. ARGGGHHH..!!! I only have a month to prepare it, yet still don't know how should I prepare for it. Errr... Actually, still too lazy to work on it. But yeah, this test will determine my future so I think I have to start and be serious. Wish me luck, please..... 7.0 will be possible, right?? OHH...YEAHHH...!!!!

Second! It's still about my teenage life, you know lha... Mostly about 'friendship', 'love life', and uni stuffs. Sigh~ I hope that someday I can get rid of these problems from my life.

Okay, so let's just break them down. First, it's about friend. I find it really-really-really-rreeeaaalllyyyy hard to find a friend whom you can trust. Seriously. So in conclusion, you CANNOT trust anyone. Telling them some of your secrets are okay, but don't give them your 'biggest' secret. Never feed them with confidential thing. 'Coz it will be the same as using a very big speaker to tell people about your secrets. It's very irritating, right. So then, this problem's getting bigger and bigger day by day. Just in my opinion, though. For example is, how should you present yourself in front of others? Should you be 100% honest, or 100% fake? Realistically, you can't be half and half. Okay, let me tell you about my experience few years ago, when I was still in my high school.

When I was in my high school, I was quite an active person (in terms of school's activities) so I did know a lot of people. However, I was pretty shy at that time, so I just know most of them without being closer with everyone that I know. Those people, always think that I'm a very friendly and patient person. I never get angry, always smile and say positive things. Even when I become the editor in chief of my school's magazine, I can't even be angry to my XXXX teams!!!

It was very different, compared to nowadays when never 'pretend' to be someone nice. I say what I think most of the time; PLUS, I will show them a 'not-so-good face' when I dislike something.

So, relating to my short story above, which one will you choose? Realizing that there are pros and cons in any decisions that you'll make. When you keep on pretending to be a nice person, everyone will "LOVE" you, even though your heart won't feel good. It hurts, especially when you have to keep it in your heart without letting anyone knows about it. And at some point, maybe you'll reach your limit, when all your pains accumulated and ready to explode. BOOMM!!!

On the other hand, when you stop pretending to be nice.. some will love you, most will "HATE" you. If you're not ready to be hated by people, you'll experience a lot of difficult times you know.. However, deep down inside your heart, there won't be any anger or grudge are kept. You'll feel more peaceful when you are honest to yourself. :) It's a personal satisfaction, I think. Hihihihi..

Personally, I'm learning to be true to myself. I want to tell the world, "TAKE ME AS I AM or WATCH ME AS I GO!" I doesn't mean to be offensive or selfish or arrogant by learning to behave this way. It's just... yeah,.. Sometimes you have to value yourself more, right? 'Coz most people in this world doesn't deserve your kindness. So yeah, experience will teach you a lot of things, they will teach you how to grow up and be mature, how to deal with good and bad people, and the most important is how to be yourself. ^___^

The next little bits, are "love life" and "uni stuffs". I can't say a lot about my 'love-life' since it will be too private to be talked. I just hope that I can have more courage, more spirit, and more confidence in pursuing my love. Nowadays, there are too many princessES in this world, so yeah... I suppose that a princess can't just sitting quietly waiting for her prince to come. She has to go out there and compete with other princesses, in order to be together with the prince.

Lastly, uni stuffs.. Can I just scream? AAARRGHHHHH....!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Love,

Mayayam

movie- 3 IDIOTS

Before, I always think that Indian movie is lame, and not worth-watching. But, I was wrong. After watching this movie, I feel Indian movie is so cool!!!

The story in this movie is very interesting, and it flows very well- from the beginning until the end. :) Additionally, It also present good morales about life, love, and friendship. You will learn a lot from this movie; about yourself, pe

ople around you, people you loved, your future, and your heart. Here is a brief synopsis about

this movie from www.imdb.com :

Farhan Qureshi (R. Madhavan), Raju Rastogi (Sharman Joshi), and Rancchoddas "Rancho" Shyamaldas Chanchad (Aamir Khan) are three engineering students who share a room in a hostel at the Imperial College of Engineering, one of the best colleges in India. While Farhan and Raju are average students from modest backgrounds, Rancho is from a rich family. Farhan wants to become a wildlife photographer, but has joined engineering college to fulfil his father's wish. Raju on the other hand wants to uplift his family fortunes. Rancho is a wealthy genius who studies for the sheer joy of it. However, Rancho's passion is for knowledge and taking apart and building machines rather than the conventional obsession of the other studen

ts with exam ranks. With his different approach Rancho incurs the wrath of dean of college, Professor Viru Sahastrabudhhe (ViruS) (Boman Irani). Rancho irritates his lecturers by giving creative and unorthodox answers, and confronts ViruS after fellow student Joy Lobo hangs himself in his dormitory room.

Threatened by Rancho's talent and free spirit, ViruS labels him an "idiot" and attempts on a number of occasions to destroy his friendship with Farhan and Raju, warning them and their parents to steer clear of Rancho. Meanwhile, Rancho also falls in love with ViruS' medical student daughter Pia (Kareena Kapoor) when he, Raju and Farha

n crash her sister's wedding banquet in order to get a free meal, in the process further infuriating ViruS.

The three students continue to anger ViruS, although Rancho continues to come first in every exam, while Chatur is

always second, and Farhan and Raju are inevitably in the last two positions. The tensions come to a head when the three friends, who are already drunk, break into ViruS's house at night to allow Rancho to propose to Pia, and then urinate on a door inside the compound before running away when ViruS senses intruders. The next day, ViruS threatens to expel Raju lest he talks on the other two. Unable to choose between betraying his friend or letting down his family, Raju jumps out of the 3rd floor window and lands on a courtyard, but after extensive care from Pia and his roommates, awakes from a coma.

Their story is framed as intermittent flashbacks from the present day, ten years after Chatur vowed revenge on Rancho for embarrassing him at the speech night and promised to become more successful than Rancho a decade later. Having lost contact with Rancho, who disappeared during the graduation party and went into seclusion, Raju and Farhan begin a journey to find him. They are joined by Chatur, now a wealthy and successful businessman, who joins them, brazenly confident that he has surpassed Rancho.

Then, will they find Rancho? What has happened to Rancho, that made him left? You'd better watch this movie!

What I've learnt from this movie is:

+ "All is well!" :) - Rancho, Farhan, Raju

+ Love your friends and family! "You can have many exams, but you'll only have one dad."-Rancho.

+ Always follow your heart. "Engineering is my passion. I love engineering. I'll never get tired of it."- Rancho

+ Respect your perents, more than anything. "I don't care what Mr. Kapoor will say, it wont make any difference in me.What you say is what really matters to me."- Farhan

+ You'd better know what 'love' really is. "Have you really ever fall in love? It's when you see the person that you like everywhere. It is when the moon looks bigger and more beautiful than what it use to be." - Rancho

+ Always stand on what you believe in! Never let something change yourself. Show the world who you are! "I have gone through many experiences before I come to who I am right now. Sir, you can keep this job for another person who will suit your criteria, because I cannot change myself."- Raju

Actually, you can find many more inside. That's what I can memorize right now. hehehe Anyway, this movie has made me laugh, cry, dream, and believe that all is well! :D